My Leg-Shaving Needs A Saving.

As a female, society tells me it is not socially acceptable to have hair on my legs. Because of this, I shave my legs. Actually, that's a lie. I shave my legs because I like them to feel soft and smooth and amazing. I'm kind of addicted to that feeling.

The point is, I shave my legs.

Like most women, I have been shaving my legs for many years. It seems like a fairly simple thing. For those of you who are not familiar with the leg shaving process, I have included a step-by-step guide:

1.) Acquire razor.
2.) Wet legs/get into shower.
3.) Apply shaving cream or conditioner to legs.
4.) Drag razor over legs.

Sounds easy, right?

Well it's not.

I am a redhead. Many redheads have sensitive skin. I have sensitive skin. Thus, whenever I get weird rashes and red spots all over my legs that FREAKING HURT. I am also a klutz. Thus, I get cuts all over my legs. This is a problem, because I love to wear shorts, and when I do wear shorts, I get tons of questions from people who want to know why I look like I've been attacked by a velociraptor. When I tell them what happened, they give me all sorts of advice.

"Use a different brand of shaving cream."

"Use a sharper razor."

"Use a duller razor."

"Go slower."

"Go faster."

And so on.

This has led me to the truth about leg-shaving; It is a magical power. You are born with the power to shave legs. Some have it, some don't. It's like Harry Potter. You get your letter to Hogwarts or you are a muggle. I am a leg-shaving muggle. I never got my letter to the Hogwarts of leg-shaving, and it's very likely that a school like that exists. That is the only explanation as to why I cannot shave my legs. I have about 13,000,000,000 scars on my legs from shaving them. The picture above is of my biggest one. The outline of it kinda looks like a heart. An evil, painful, makes-you-bleed, heart.

Now that scar is not that big. It certainly doesn't compare to Bullet Wound (my other scar who you will meet before long) but believe me, it was bad. The tub was so red, it looked like a scene from Psycho. I was in the shower for an extra 30 minutes waiting for the bleeding to stop. And it didn't for a whole freaking day.

But I got a sweet scar, so it's all good.